What's Keeping You Stuck?
Mar 21, 2024
Have you ever had this experience after you’ve made a big life change?
Once you’re comfortable in your new scenario, you start to reflect. Now, with this emotional distance, you can FEEL and SEE how much weight you had been carrying all of that time? You looked back and thought, “How did I make it through? Why didn’t I leave earlier? What was I so afraid of losing?”
When we are INSIDE of a situation that isn’t great, we may want to move but fear that things could get worse. “Worse” feels impossible. When we are already overwhelmed, it just feels like too much to take on.
Fear can keep us stuck. Fear of the unknown. Fear of change. Fear of failure. We even have a saying for this, “The devil we know is better than the devil we don’t”.
Those fears are part of the normal human experience. On their own, they really aren’t a big problem. Sure, we don’t want to fail. It can be embarrassing. It hurts. It also reminds us to reflect before we dive recklessly into something new every other week.
In that way, the fear is protective. But when is it too much? When do we ignore the fear and make the change anyway?
These are great questions.
And…only you can answer them.
But, a guide or coach can help you find your way to your own truth. So, here are some guiding questions that could help you decide if it’s time to make a move or not.
- What’s the worst case scenario that is bringing you so much discomfort?
- If the worst happened, how would you handle it?
- Thinking of your current situation, what would your dream scenario be? What could your life look like if everything worked out? What would you choose instead?
- If you don’t take action to make a change, what will your life look like in 5 years? 10 years? How would you feel in 5-10 years if nothing changed?
- Is this feeling FEAR or is it actually ANXIETY? Since they both feel similar (if not the same), sometimes it’s hard to decide. Both are trying to keep you safe (physically or psychologically). The difference is FEAR is there to make you think through your decision before you act. FEAR leads you to evaluate the situation more carefully. ANXIETY doesn’t want you to think, it just wants you to follow blindly. Anxiety leads you to avoidance and isolation.
In this way, we can reflect on what’s going on to determine if the FEAR is holding you back from something better or if it’s keeping you safe from making an irrational decision.
Some difficult and uncomfortable situations are impossible to avoid. But sometimes, we stay too long. Once you know it’s time for a change, the next step is building the courage to take the leap. We’ll talk about that next week!
You deserve the joy and peace you desire! I’m cheering you on!
Much Love,
Stacey