Done All The Inner Work? What Might Still Be Holding You Back!
Nov 01, 2024
If you’re like me, you really love all things personal growth.
I spoke to a woman recently who had a really hard childhood. She’s determined not to be a victim of her childhood and has spent years in therapy doing the work to forgive and heal. I have lots of respect for her.
She’s come a really long way. However, with all of the talk therapy, journaling, sound healing, meditation, etc…she’s at a place where she can see her cycles of anxiety and depression before they come. She knows exactly what phase she’s in and what will come next. But none of the work she has done has allowed her to stop it from happening. Which is the ultimate goal.
She can fully and completely articulate what’s going on and why. Talking to her I noted that it was very clear that she has done a TON of work. Meditation has helped her slow things down. Talk therapy has helped her recognize her patterns and even where they originated. Therapy has helped her feel seen and understood which is therapeutic all on its own. Journaling has given her a chance to get her emotions on paper and helps her understand them. There are a lot of benefits to all of this.
BUT…why is it that some people can do all of those things and still feel triggered by their past?
In one word…trauma.
We distinguish different types of traumas: trauma with a big T or trauma with a little t. Big T trauma is a major traumatic event that is easy to recognize as deeply distressing like natural disasters, war, severe accidents, abuse, etc. Little t trauma is less obvious but still can accumulate over time and significantly affect mental health like emotional abuse, bullying, or chronic stress, or even moments in childhood that shaped your perspective. There is some evidence that everyone experiences little t trauma in childhood.
Trauma is stored differently than regular memories. It is stored in our bodies. The amygdala is the filter for how our brain is going to address information coming in through our senses. If the amygdala senses danger, it bypasses the logic and reasoning side of our brain because that takes too much time. Instead, it’s sending messages directly to the body. Your cells memorize the scenario and prepare to keep you safe anytime you are faced with a similar situation. The traumatic memory is stored in your body.
That’s why the standard methods take you a long way but may leave you feeling like a. EMDR helps you reprocess that trauma (big T or little t). Each of the other methods have great benefits, it just depends on what you actually need.
So, if you’ve tried it all but something is still holding you back from living full of joy and freedom, maybe it’s time to try another method.
I’m a huge fan of EMDR. It’s not the right fit for everyone but if you’re curious, I’m happy to schedule a time to chat with you to talk about your specific needs!
You deserve the joy and peace you desire! I’m cheering you on!
All my love,
Stacey